Pregnancy #8

ends up as pregnancy loss #6.

Not really sure where I go from here

So E has come to terms with the fact that we may never have any more children. I sadly have not. After 5 unsuccessful rounds of clomid, 1 failed IUI and lots of uncertainty I feel like I don't know where to go. I wonder if I am pursuing another child because of all of the babies I have lost. Do I really want another child or do I just think I want another child because those opportunities have been taken away from me. It will be 2 years in July that we have been TTC that third child. My last bfp was in December 2007. I think I have to find a way to let this part of my life go. It makes me sad.

Clomid...round 3

So this one may end up being a bust too. After the cyst cleared from round 1 I was able to start round 2. Yippee. I went in for my u/s check to find out that I only had 1 follie and it was on the right side, bummer. So this month I went in and they decided to up my dose of clomid to 150mg and boy oh boy did the hot flashes show up this time. I went in for an u/s today and there is not much happening right now. I saw her measure 1 follie (I assume on my left), but it must have been pretty small. I am scheduled to go back again on Tuesday and pray that things have improved. They were going to discuss putting me back on another round of clomid if things haven't progressed by then. I am just frustrated. I just feel like my body won't cooperate.

Cysts.

So the only thing the first round of clomid gave me were cysts. Well, not true. I did have 2 nice follies that did not get me pg. So I went in for my day 3 b/w and u/s and found out I have cysts on my left ovary, so no clomid for me this month. I totally was not expecting that. They offered to put me on bcp for a month to get them to go away, but I just couldn't do it.
What a heartbreaker last month was: 100mg clomid, antibiotics, HSG/SHG, baby aspirin, trigger shots, Lovenox injections and progesterone that made me feel like I had a yeast infection and killed my sex drive. After doing all of that I had really hoped for a better outcome. Better luck in 2 months.

Nada.

1st round of clomid was a bust. Bummer.

Still alive and kicking

Just thought I would give a little update. I am still around and doing alright. Life has been bumpy. My job, my marriage, etc. It's amazing the toll this past year took on me. We are still TTC baby #3. I will be going to an RE on December 5th and hopefully I will walk away with a plan. I just have to decide how far I am willing to go. I hope to be back more often and to give more regular updates. Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

Life knocks you down. It's when you stop getting up that it is time to cry.

And I am so ready to cry. My mom is in the isolation unit of the hospital with a MRSA infection in each arm that she picked up while getting iv's at another hospital and my dad is in the same hospital with a blood clot in his leg. My step-dad is back to living with me and , well what else is there to say. Each time it's getting harder and harder to stay positive and pull myself up by the bootstraps so to speak.