The Cost of Day Care.

So I'm unsure whether the cost of my child care is going up or my willingness to pay for it has gone down. I do not pay for child care with the almighty $$$, instead I think I pay for it with my soul. Seriously, we have family watch our children and I AM DONE!! The price is too high. I am disrespected and my home is disrepected. The way it works is DH is home with the kids on Monday, great granny is here on Tues and Thurs, MIL or FIL on Wednesday and my mom on Friday. DH leaves for work at 1:30 and I am home at 4:30. So for 3 hours everyday I need a day care provider. This was the schedule that was put before us prior to Jacob's birth and since we were limited in funds it seemed like a good choice. Plus it meant my kids were in my home all day and I knew they were getting one on one attention. I have to say I haven't been overly thrilled with the attention MIL and FIL have been giving the boys. Now that summer is here iut is better, because they go out, but in the winter the IL's just watch TV while the kids entertain themselves. I would prefer they color with them or bake or DO something...anything. My mom, even though she is unreliable, interacts with them.
Do you want to know about the straw?? The straw that broke the fucking camel's back??
FIL is the biggest gaping asshole out there. I already posted that we lost the bid on the house, so E is feeling a little bummed already. FIL came over today and asked about it and when E said it fell through fucking FIL was happy. Ecstatic, might describe it better. He then proceded to tell my husband that he has a horrible job that doesn't support his family and he doesn't have retirement and blah blah blah. Nothing like telling your son he is a loser. FIL then went on to say they wouldn't drive out to provide daycare if we had bought hte home and had we thought about that. Well yes...we figured we would drive our kids to the sitters until we found a home day care center in our new town. (The new place would have been a 15 minute longer commute for FIL). He then said we couldn't afford it. Hello, I crunched numbers and yeah it was tight, but we actually were approved for 75k more than our top limit that we feel comfortable with. We even sat down with 2 different bank people and ran the numbers (we're looking at 19% of our gross to our home costs whereas 28% is normal, and our debt ratio is 22% as opposed to Joe Schmoe who is at 45%) We are not stupid people. I can't believe FIL would be such a dick as to throw away his realtionship with his son. This is not the first time he has insulted Ethan, but it will be the last time he does it in our home. The thinmg that kills me is that it crushed E. Crushed him. And E is the most agreeable of all of FIL's kids and all FIL can say is that M and N (E's siblings have state jobs so he doesn't have to worry about them).
So now I am in the search for a day care provider. I am willing to sell a kidney to get he money to pay for it just so we don't have to rely on FIL anymore. When I came home teoday he was oblivious to the fact that he was a jackass. I didn't say more than Thank You when he told me any info about the kids and when MIL asked if I had a bad day at work I told her NO. She said Oh you seem tense. I looked at her adn said I am tense and then I walked out of the room.
Did I mention that E spent all morning cleaning only to have FIL let the kids trash the place in the half hour that E was in the shower? This is common. When I come home on Wednesdays there are times I can't even walk in the door the place is so trashed. OK I'm done bitching at the moment.